by Herman B. HayesToday is Straight Pride Day!
Really, though, every day is Straight Pride Day, at least for me. It should be for you, too. The homos think that the way to show pride is to dress like a whore and go parade in the street while groping each other. Now, all of you know my views on the sodomites and lesbians. I am not very fond of them, to say the least. However, I might be slightly less offended, slightly, if they could at least walk down the street with all their clothes on.
It is disgusting.
There is no reason for these children of Satan to flaunt their immorality in this way, but I am beginning to digress. We need to start celebrating Straight Pride Day. We need to celebrate it each and every day of the week. We need to put our heterosexuality at the forefront, and let everyone know how straight we are. We need to dress straight, act straight, walk straight and talk straight. Remember, there is no way for someone to tell you are straight unless you show them you are straight.
It is time for straights to get out of the closet!
Why be timid? We need to show off our pride in being attracted to members of the opposite sex. There is nothing wrong with pickup lines and catcalls, they just prove that you are a man who obeys the word of God. Sexual harassment in the workplace is nothing more than proving that you are righteous. If the object of your Godly comments does not appreciate them, well, they must be nothing more than a minion of Satan. Remember, folks:
We’re here, we’re straight, and also righteous, get used to it.