Welcome, Soon To Be Followers

by Michael Gregory Steele and Herman B. Hayes

I would like to personally extend my welcome to the latest influx of godless liberals from both Fark and Netscape. I’m glad that your curiosity about how the other half lives has brought you to our door. And by “the other half” I mean those with a coherent political ideology and who aren’t bound for the fiery and eternal pit of torment. I’d ask that you wipe your feet as you enter so as to not track sin into our home.

I’m very excited that you Farkers especially have taken time out of your busy schedule of Photoshoping “O Rly” owls to devote some energy to your personal salvation. So for everyone who’s new here to get a sense for our mission, we’d like to present you with a list of posts from the last several months that we feel are representative of our righteous mission. You might not agree with everything Herman and I have to say, but you will. In the meantime just try not to agitate our followers by openly disagreeing with anything we have written.

• Rush Limbaugh’s Little Blue Nightmare
• Ending the Women’s Suffrage Experiment
• Bush Vetoes His Way into My Heart
• Santorum Leads in the Poll
• Liberal Traitors: Stop Burning American Flags
• The Devil Wears Condoms
• My Lord Is Not Huggable
• Democrats Will Let Terrorists Kill You
• Judge Hands Terrorists the Keys to Your Home