O'Conner Makes the Wisest Decision of Her Life

by Michael Gregory Steele and Herman B. Hayes

In case you haven't yet heard the glorious news, allow me to brighten your day with this: Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O'Conner has finally resigned. Even though she was a Reagan appointee, I always thought she was a very unwise pick (and I almost never question Reagan's judgment).

She may have been a "conservative", but she was also an unholy obstacle in a lot of important cases, included the only case I really care about: Roe v. Wade. I'm not even sure whose bright idea it was to allow women to serve on that bench in the first place.

When George W. Bush spoke today about O'Conner's resignation he said the following:

"The nation also deserves a dignified process of confirmation in the United States Senate - characterized by fair treatment, a fair hearing and a fair vote."

This is obviously a stern warning to Democrats not to fillibuster his nominee. So you know that this means our glorious President is planning to nominate someone extremely conservative (and I mean Michael Gregory Steele conservative). Just thinking about all the decisions that could be handed down by a more conservative Supreme Court fills me with unimaginable delight.

With the talk of judges John Paul Stevens and William Rehnquist possibly stepping down at some point, President Bush might get the opportunity to fill a total of three Supreme Court seats. We may finally be given the chance to remake the Supreme Court into a tribunal of Godly righteousness, a court that can finally remove that idiotic legal distinction between God's law and man's law.

At long last are my dreams finally being realized?

There are a lot of people who don't want to see abortion become illegal in this country. There are also a lot of people who want to see a firm separation between Church and State maintained. There are even people who don't want to see the Supreme Court overrun by hardline conservatives. Fortunately, these are not the people who helped to put President Bush into the White House, so their opinions matter very little.

My advice to any liberals who may be reading this is to simply give in to the inevitability of a very conservative Supreme Court. President Bush is going to appoint judges that will show you the true meaning of "judicial activism" and Republicans will maintain their Senate majority (even after the 2006 elections) ensuring their swift confirmation. There is nothing you can do to stop this.

Lastly, I would also advice you godless liberals to start being a little more civil to me in your comments. You certainly wouldn't want to offend a future Supreme Court justice.