Thursday, June 23, 2005

Understanding Liberal Idiocy: Part III

by Michael Gregory Steele and Herman B. Hayes

Note: If you missed them, be sure to read Part I and Part II.

Now that you better understand what makes liberals the way they are and how much of a threat they all pose, the only thing left to discuss is how to protect yourself and the ones you love from their evil and filthy clutches.

The first step in protecting your family is cutting off all access to the mainstream media. The media simply goes out of its way to make our beloved President Bush look foolish. It makes Republicans look like a pack of corrupt liars. It also bends over backwards trying to appease interest groups like homosexuals, women and minorities. The news is no longer Christian-friendly fare. The mainstream media only serves to weaken our godly conservative resolve and make us that much more susceptible to liberal brainwashing.

Where can you turn when you want to be informed about the world but not too informed?

There are a few sources of news and information you can turn to that won’t bombard you with vile liberal propaganda and provide you with only relevant facts. These sources are part of what I have previously deemed The Righteous Media. They include of course Fox News, and this blog among others.

A great idea for you and your family is to limit your blogging to Conservatives for American Values. We will tell you everything you need to know and absolutely nothing more.

The second step in countering the liberal threat is to constantly remain indignant. You can not allow your rage toward liberals to wane even for a second. Again, you can turn to this blog to fill you with enough discontent to continue fighting this great battle against liberals.

I will constantly remind you of what these godless unbelievers are trying to do to this country. Remember, America is the greatest of all nations. If there is anything that seems less than pure or awe-inspiring about America it is undoubtedly a result of the overwhelming dark cloud of liberalism raining down upon America’s pristine perfection.

The third and final step is to simply vote Republican. This step is just plain common sense. If we make sure that Republicans maintain the House, the Senate and the White House we can begin to stack the courts with Conservatives judges. Only once every branch of government (including judicial) is solidly Republican can we stand even a fighting chance against the great evil that is liberalism.

We are fighting a great and holy war against liberalism -- a war I personally have no intention of losing.

21 Comments:

At June 23, 2005 2:48 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

u guys f*cking s*ck!!

 
At June 23, 2005 3:06 PM, Blogger Michael Gregory Steele said...

anonymous: what an interesting (moronic) way to write a comment. Let's see if I can speak to you in a way that you'll understand:

t*ke a b*th, u sm*lly h*ppie

 
At June 23, 2005 3:53 PM, Anonymous Kenny said...

Can you tell the difference between opponents and enemies? Real Americans fight and destroy our shared enemies, we debate opponents. The Rush O'Hannity entertainers of the world have successfully blurred that line. Should everyone think the same as you - is that a goal? Can you not co-exist in this great country with someone that has another opinion? Sounds like fascism.

 
At June 23, 2005 4:59 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

This site is great! What a fun read. It blurs the lines of reality at the same time it "frames" conservatism. Kinda like what Rush does to the Left. The folks this will most effectively target will not realize what you are doing! No one has commented about the obvious giveaway on your main page. Don't worry your secret is safe with me.

 
At June 23, 2005 6:28 PM, Blogger Michael Gregory Steele said...

kenny: liberals, terrorist, people who are inconveniently in our way. What is the difference?

If fascism is a way to make liberals like you stop prattling on endlessly about respecting each others opinions, then yes fascism it is.

 
At June 23, 2005 6:36 PM, Blogger Michael Gregory Steele said...

anonymous: You accusation of treason has not gone unnoticed.

Herman and I am here to show people what conservativism is and and what it should be. Save this framing nonsense for the rest of your Lakoff reading pinko comrades.

 
At June 23, 2005 6:45 PM, Anonymous thayer said...

This is a joke, right? Irony?

 
At June 23, 2005 7:03 PM, Blogger Michael Gregory Steele said...

thayer: the Democratic Party is the real joke.

 
At June 23, 2005 10:22 PM, Blogger ariadneK, Ph.D. said...

Dude, I think the REAL joke is the cheesy picture of yourself that you have posted...surely that isn't really you? The most damage you could do to ANYONE is to run up to them and try to sell them a used car if so!

 
At June 23, 2005 10:36 PM, Blogger Michael Gregory Steele said...

ariadnek: Ah, liberal name calling, that never gets old.

You are perhaps somewhat surprised to see a conservative even more clean cut and handsome than Sean Hannity himself -- Handsome, in that rugged all American way, not in a metrosexual "I'm trying to hard" sort of way.

 
At June 24, 2005 12:49 AM, Blogger Scott C. Smith said...

Great satire, guys. For instance, the fact that you respond to a poster by saying their comment is "moronic" and then later bringing up the fact that a poster resorted to "liberal name calling." Funny stuff! Because you resorted to name calling! That's great.

 
At June 24, 2005 11:07 AM, Blogger Michael Gregory Steele said...

scott c. smith: I'm simply trying to elevate the debate, retard.

 
At June 24, 2005 4:18 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there
'degrees' of abomination?

Since you are the "offical experts" on God's word I know you will have the answer.

 
At June 24, 2005 4:56 PM, Blogger mm said...

I just figured it out. Thanks for the laughs, guys.

 
At June 24, 2005 5:27 PM, Blogger Michael Gregory Steele said...

anonymous: That is why Herman and I are here. As direct conduits to God, we answer any confusion people might have about the Bible.

shellfish are the good kind of abomination (if properly cooked) while
homosexuality is the bad kind of abomination. I hope this clears things up for you.

 
At June 24, 2005 5:28 PM, Blogger Michael Gregory Steele said...

mm: I'm glad you finally have seen the light.

 
At July 03, 2005 10:16 AM, Anonymous pia said...

The name Savage is a great American last name. It was given to my great grandparents at Ellis Island. How much more American can you get?

Been reading Dan Savage for years; don't know if he's a relative or not but will take him over Mike Savage any day!

Don't usually go to other blogs to fight people. Get enough people at Bring it On! but you guys make me even sicker than some other people

 
At July 03, 2005 3:34 PM, Blogger Michael Gregory Steele said...

pia: Perhaps your disgust is misdirected. Liberals often become disgusted with themselves after reading this blog, sometimes that comes out as anger directed at me and the truths that I preach.

 
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