Saturday, October 08, 2005

The Champions of Intelligent Design

by Michael Gregory Steele and Herman B. Hayes

I thought that the best way to conclude this week dedicated to destroying the sacrilegious field of science would be to showcase the heroes in this epic battle for very soul of America. These people are not sinners in white lab coats, but saintly men of God like you and me (well, at least me for certain). These are not men who waste their days in darkened laboratories squinting into microscopes -- no, a microscope is not necessary to read the Bible.

So who are the champions of intelligent design who dare to ask the question, why does God have no place in science?

As previously mentioned there's Philip E. Johnson, who is considered the father of the intelligent design movement and one of the principle advocates of its teaching in our schools. And at the risk of being redundant I would like to again present this quote from him, because it sums up the aim of ID so well:
[C]ultivating ambiguity by employing secular language in arguments which are carefully crafted to avoid overtones of theistic creationism is a necessary first step for ultimately reintroducing the Christian concept of God as the designer.
Another big player in this movement is William Dembski, a senior fellow at the Discovery Institute. He's also the author of Intelligent Design, the Bridge Between Science and Theology which contains the following statement:
Christ is indispensable to any scientific theory, even if its practitioners don't have a clue about him. The pragmatics of a scientific theory can, to be sure, be pursued without recourse to Christ. But the conceptual soundness of the theory can in the end only be located in Christ.
Aside from these evangelical Christians who are attempting to reshape science in the image of Jesus Christ, there are also the usual champions of any conservative Christian cause. Dr. James Dobson's Focus on the Family has a section of their site devoted to ID with the following introduction:
Are we humans the result of meaningless processes that did not have us in mind? Or were we created on purpose—by design? The answer to these questions is key to many public issues debated in our society, including abortion, marriage, sexuality, bioethics, human rights and so on. Yet in most public schools, only one view may be taught: naturalistic evolution...
You see, there is little difference in the views of those who advocate the teaching of intelligent design. Overwhelmingly these supporters are evangelical Protestants -- men of God. These men all want the same ultimate goal: science that centers around Jesus Christ, not Charles Darwin or Isaac Newton.

This debate though is ultimately about trust. Just who do you trust to decide what ideas are to be deemed scientific, a bunch of atheist Nobel laureates, or people who actually know God?

Let me conclude this week by issuing this ultimatum to everyone reading this: either reject traditional science and accept intelligent design or get used to the idea of burning atop Satan's Bunsen burner of unspeakable torment for all eternity.


At October 08, 2005 10:03 PM, Blogger Michael Gregory Steele and Herman B. Hayes said...

bkwrd_dog: Yes it's a brilliant way to avoid a repeat of the scopes monkey trial. This new packaging of creationism allows its proponents to look more like scientific intellectuals than "Bible thumpers." But soon those godless frogs will in fact find themselves boiled alive. That will be a joyous day indeed.

At October 26, 2005 2:50 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Is this site for real or is it a parody?

I really want to know.

At October 26, 2005 3:19 PM, Blogger Michael Gregory Steele and Herman B. Hayes said...

angela: You should not presume to tell me what to do. Do you have any idea who you are talking to? I think if you did that you wouldn't take such an insolent tone. I don't accept such nonsense from anyone and certainly not a woman.

dan: You are so misguided and so confused. You've come to the right place as you are in need of some serious moral guidance.

I mean your question is beyond ridiculous. Do you see any notice at the bottom of the page to make you think this site is anything less than sincere? Just follow my teachings and stop asking so many questions.

At November 08, 2005 3:52 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think that whenever the ID kooks raise their heads, someone should ask them this question:

What if there really is an intelligent designer of life on Earth--and it's Cthulhu, making himself a snack?

Of course, the fact that these semiliterate Bible-thumping hicks have typically never read Lovecraft does rob the question of a lot of its impact. It's still funny and relevant, though.


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