How to win the Church and State argument

by Anonymous

We are under siege, and our faith is under attack.

Whenever any attempt is made to bring God into his Church (the United States), it is struck down. "Separation of Church and State" is the rallying cry of the godless unbelievers. While many among you would have no response to this nuanced 5 word argument, I certainly would.

Simply use the following arguments against anyone who believes God has no place in this government.

Argument 1:
"Separation of Church and State" does not appear in the Constitution
This is of course technically true since the phrase does not appear anywhere in the Constitution (take care not to precede this unholy phrase with "the idea of" or "principle of"). This should be enough to completely shatter the world view of your attacker.

If however this enemy of God starts talking about interpretations of the First Amendment, move on to the second argument.

Argument 2:
"In God We Trust" is our country's motto and appears on US currency.
Mention that since of the framers were religious (read: Christian) they founded this country upon Christian ideals and principles. Why else would "In God We Trust" be our motto? This is certainly not the creed of a godless country.

Hope against hope that your enemy doesn't know this only became our national motto in 1956 (although it did appear on a coin in 1864). If he does know this unfortunate bit of information, say that although the framers didn't coin the phrase, it certainly was their belief. With you opponent temporarily disarmed by this clever pun, quickly move on to Argument 3.

Argument 3:
The Framers of the Constitution never intended for God not to play a part in government.
Framer's intent is often used as a justification for separation of church and state, but it could just as easily be used as an argument against it. This is especially effective against someone who has absolutely no idea what they are talking about.

God permitting, you are not presented with this quote from Thomas Jefferson (or another like it from an actual framer):

... I contemplate with sovereign reverence that act of the whole American people which declared that their legislature should make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof, thus building a wall of separation between church and state.

If you are presented with such a quote, unless your name happens to be Michael Gregory Steele, you are undoubtedly intellectually outmatched. But there is no need to despair, because you are morally superior and can win this battle with one last righteous argument (Argument 4) .

Argument 4:
If any of the founding fathers could see what is happening to this country now they would have a different opinion. If any founder saw two men engaging in homosexual intercourse, he would immediately press for an amendment banning such acts, that is after he was finished vomiting into his hat.

This argument is of course, irrefutable. If you choose to follow my sage advise, you can win the separation of church and state argument against anyone who would oppose you.

A final note: Separation of church and state may not have been the framers' intent, but they lived in a much different America. If the founders could see the sin and debauchery that we all must witness daily then God would no doubt have been very prominent in the Constitution. This is why we must work towards amending this document in order to add God wherever possible. We do this only so we can invite God back into his church.